Dear Surfline…

i was an advocate. 

You were my solution to Vodafone’s indifference and BLU’s cluelessness.  I drove from one end of Osu to East legon, was turned away 3rice because you were out of stock. And still came back. 

Our honeymoon was beautiful. Someone stole my first dongle and i bought another two hours later because you had given me a super speed itch that i had to scratch. 

I loved you. I splurged on you. I bragged on you. I made sweet referral love to you. And now this is how you do me? You must be outta your damn mind. 

You think this is a game? You think i spent all this money on you so you could do me like this? What’s with the attitude? You think loading gmail should take more than 3 minutes? There’s been nothing 4 about your G for a while. 

It’s gone to your head, huh? All this attention. I see. Now you think you’re it. You think you can get comfortable? Be mediocre? And i’m just gonna settle for whatever crap internet you give me? Don’t cross me ratchet. I ain’t gotta live with you. Tolerate you.  You ain’t dumsor. I ain’t playin’. 

I survived Edge. I’mma kill you before you kill me. Muck around and i’mma burn this mutha… wait… they already tried that, huh? 

It’s about time? I wouldn’t know. Because i’m suspended in time waiting for word docs to download. I’ve watched so many endless loading loop rotations i fear i may have been unknowingly hypnotized. It’s about time these youtube videos stopped buffering. About time my tweets were loading right now. About time your customer service people stopped suggesting i turn my device off and on again. Power buttons don’t perform miracles. And that is what you need. Desperately. 

It’s about time? About time you fixed your sh#! 


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